THE PREGNANT VIRGIN

Dear diary,

As amazing as conceiving is

Being a pregnant maiden can be shocking

Consilience becomes a daily routine

Doing all to find out what happened

Everyday you wake up to queries 

From people you do and do not know

Going out you hear tattles about

How loose and crass you've become

Irrespective of what really happened

Judgement is based on societal muse

Knowledge from what they see and hear

Labour of love is what I call it

Moving into a new phase of my life

New blood is growing within me

Only way out is through

Pregnant as I am

Questions will always come

Rare as it is, it must be done

Surrogacy is what it's called

Telling all who care to know

Unabridged version of my story

Virgin that got gravid without coitus

Well-defined is my mission

Xenogeneic is what is inside me

Yes, I am ready

Zero hour has come!

THE BRAVEST GIRL(S) IN THE WORLD

Dear diary,

Last night I watched Christiane Amanpour's interview with Malala Yousafzai, apparently the bravest girl in the world. She is the 16 year old Pakistani school pupil that was shot in the head by Taliban gunmen because she wanted to go to school.

On January 15, 2009, the Taliban announced on the radio that from that day, "no girl must go to school." Malala was born into a family that believes in freedom. According to her father, its better to be free for one day than to be  enslaved for eternity. She wanted to become a doctor in the future, have a positive impact in the society and the only way to achieve that was to go to school. On october 9, 2012, Malala was shot in the head by Taliban gunmen on her while returning home from school. She was in a critical condition and had to be flown to England for recuperation. The whole world gathered to pray for her defying religion and ethnicity, and today she can tell her story.

As I watched the interview, so many things came to mind; Ghost law against women and education, Boko haram insurgence against western education and Child marriage.

Malala's story is similar to that of a lot of girls in some parts of Nigeria. The only difference is that they have been stopped from going to school by their very own parents and family in the name of culture and tradition. I call it a ghost law because such parents would never agree with you that such a law is in place, but they abide by it. The girls want to go to school and become relevant in the society too but that dream cannot be a reality because their people believe a woman's place is in the kitchen.

According to his excellency, Boko haram has always been in Nigeria but it presented itself to the public after it claimed responsibility for the Independence day bombing of 2009. I've lost count of the number of schools that have been bombed over the years and even the number of students that have been killed or maimed for life. They wanted to go to school too but they were not given the chance too. Those that still go to school do so with fear and trembling in their heart, expecting the expected. The militants say they are against western education, yet they use the internet to upload videos claiming responsibility for attacks.

Child marriage has always been among us as a nation but few a ready to stand against it. We know it exists, our brothers and fathers are marrying the little girls and instead of the society to speak against it, we look the other way. Children are bethrothed to older men and have no chance of education. The child is damaged emotionally, psychologically, physically and mentally. She is programmed like a machine and is left with no choice than to obey.

Malala is just like the average teenage girl in Nigeria. What differentiates her from the girls' here is that she has been given a voice to speak out. Who will give the girls' here a voice?

Just thinking.

STATE OF THE NATION: Danfo incorporated

Dear Diary,

 

Living in Lagos,Nigeria has been a wonderful experience so far. I've learnt some monumental lessons that I can't trade for anything in the world. Survival skills, the hustlers carriage and pricing tactics are some of the intangible rewards of living in Lagos. Even though the noisy generators and owambe parties tend to constitute a nuisance in the state, over time you tend to develop thick skin to it all.

 

Today, I found myself in a danfo and I couldn't help but think about the transport system in Lagos. The transport system has evolved over the years from the era of molue and danfo to keke napep, okada, yellow cabs (Taxi), BRT's (Bus Rapid Transit) and the gradually improving train system. For any state to perform well, there has to be a stable judiciary system in place and that's why bans have been placed on different modes of transport in different parts of the state with dire consequences awaiting anyone found wanting.  The Danfo has been around for a long time and It is still a major form of transport for the average lagosian. Bus fares have been increased from time to time but that has not detered our love for le danfo. The yellow buses are not nicknamed danfo for nothing. Being a non-yoruba lagosian, I want to believe the yellow buses are called danfo because of the wear and tear they have undergone. These buses were originally used for corporate services but after they have become veterans at the mechanic shop due to repairs for many years, they are sold to these drivers at a much cheaper rate. Sometimes when they buy these buses they are without headlamps, side mirrors, seat belts and brakes!. Yes brakes! I was seated in one of such buses today.

 

The danfo I entered was nothing to write home about. The driver was shouting "ojuelegba... #50 bus" and innocent citizens apparently oblivious of the critical condition of the bus were boarding. We knew the danfo was a write off but it was the only affordable and available mode of transport to our destination. When the bus was full, the driver refused to move. Did I mention that he doubled as the conductor of the bus? He insisted on collecting the fares before moving. To get  the bus moving, he had to join two pieces of naked wire while telling the passenger on his right to put his seat belt on. The confused passenger after much searching finally found a black rope that was the supposed seat belt. The ride was a bumpy one as usual and so we were not bothered that the driver was moving much slower than a bicycle. After much persuation he increased his speed. It was not until he bumped into another vehicle that I understood the whole thing. The bus had no brakes!

 

The driver had been moving slowly and hitting pavements because the brakes were not working. In order for him to stop at a bus stop for a passenger to alight, he had to bump into a car for safety. I thought it was a mistake the first time but after he did it two more times, I was sure it was on purpose. The straw that broke the camel's back reared its head when he reached my bus stop. As big as the danfo was, he bumped into a keke napep because there was no other vehicle in sight. The driver of the keke napep took one look at the danfo driver and parked. He came down and started exchanging words with the driver. When curses started flying in the air, yours truly took to her heels. If there is anything I've learnt in Lagos, it is to avoid a fighting scene.

 

The danfo's are part and parcel of the Lagos scene just as owambe parties can never be over emphasised. We know that some of them are death traps in motion but while we board them, it is important that we look out for our safety. Yes, the seat belt is a rope but at least that rope can reduce the damages an accident may cause. If you are sitting by the door, insist on having the door closed before the bus moves.These are some of the safety measures you should accustom yourself with while in Lagos. Also, if you notice that the bus has no brakes or is in a very bad condition, its better for you not to board because your life has no duplicate.

 

As to what happened to the driver at the end of the day, I am not sure. One thing I do know is that he would still go and carry a new set of unknowing passengers in his death trap.Free advice; be on the look out and avoid him. Its better to be late than to be the Late.

 

 

Gracias.

THE MAN IN THE MIRROR

“Yeah ,I’m talking to you…you in the mirror” these were the words I kept saying to myself as I looked at myself in the mirror before leaving the house. At this moment you might be thinking that I have lost it but hey, research has shown  that everyone is allowed 5 minutes of madness everyday. It all started when I was watching an episode of keeping up with the kardashians. In this episode, kim was playfully thrown into the river by her fiancée Kris and then she discovered that she had misplaced her earings. She came out of the water crying and people were surprised at her action because it was just an “EARING”. She said that she was crying because the earing cost her 75,000 dollars and she just got them recently. I also lambasted her because I was wondering why a human being would cry that hard for something that can be replaced…I did not try to put myself in her shoes.

Then the next day, I had my own “kim” moment. I was sent on an errand to the bank to pay in some money and I was in a hurry because I did not want the bank to close before me. I quickly took a shower and was trying to dress up when I found out that my shirt was not ironed. I rushed to the room and put on the iron with the hope that it would heat up while I was getting ready. After a while I went back to iron my shirt and without checking the heat I placed it on my shirt……...”Aaaarrrgghh” was all that came out when I opened my mouth. My beautiful shirt was no more because It had been burnt. I could not cry because no one was at home to listen to me but then I started laughing when I remembered kim’s earing. The same way I insulted her because she was crying for her earing  is the same way some of you reading this would insult me because I was sad about the burnt shirt.

Well it’s a case of different strokes for different folks because what you’ll hold dear to your heart may be something I’ll just overlook. My shirt might not be as expensive as kim’s earings but then I liked my shirt a lot. The lesson here is that it is not cool to pass judgement on people so quickly without hearing their side of the issue. A lot of times when we hear stories about people we don’t even know from Adam or even those we are close to, we just write them off without trying to put ourselves in their shoes or even see them through God’s eyes (which is just and fair by the way). At least everyone deserves a chance to explain themselves. The moral of the story is that we should learn to be patient and not be too quick to pass judgement on people unless you can put yourself in their shoes because “it is he that wears the shoe that knows where it pinches him”.

            So my new motto is "what you don’t want people to do to you, don’t do to other people". Also, at the end of the day kim found her earing at the bottom of the river but my shirt was burnt beyond repair *crying*.

FEEL FREE TO DROP YOUR COMMENTS AND CRITICISMS…….gracias!